Jamie (tehquill) wrote in shinahil,

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Random yeah stuff omgwtessay

So I was told to do a narrative essay for English Comp 1 class, and I did. Thought I'd share.

The Confessions of a Professional Occultist

Where did it start? At what point did my mind become so twisted and
disturbed? Way back in the beginning, could I ever have guessed that
I'd be a major influence on such a well-known political leader? That
I'd someday be­—so to speak­—the power behind the throne? My position
was obtained through nothing but lies and trickery; it was little more
than skillful use of deception and vague predictions. You see, I was a
professional occultist­—a sorcerer to be exact. Oh, I know what you're
thinking; sorcery is something from those ancient days, right? The
only people who did that sort of stuff were involved with crazy cults
who hid away in caves and whatnot. Well, at the point in time when I
became so powerful, people were ready to turn to anything that might
give them some idea of what was going on; they were fools looking for
a shepherd, and I saw it as a perfect opportunity.
I suppose all of this first started back when I was but a young
adult, looking for my lot in life. When I was a young child, I learned
that careful use of words could easily be used to manipulate those
around me, but it wasn't until I was about seventeen that I really put
it to use. That I could take my own words and twist them to make
people believe that I possessed knowledge of the future­—that I could
predict what was to come. There were plenty of skeptics, of course.
They were primarily people who knew me before I started "predicting"
things. There were a select few, though, who would hang on my every
word as if it were gospel. If any of my predictions did not come true,
I'd find a way to twist the vague details I gave them, showing them
that I did in fact predict what happened. I believe it was from that
point that things really started to go up hill (or perhaps it would be
Five years later I had moved from my home in the country to live in a
big city. I positively loved the city, for the greater number of
people around me, the greater number of customers I could perform my
divine services for (i.e. con out of their cold hard cash). After
years of practicing my "art", I became quite good at it. Even the
worst skeptics would come to me for advice, to learn what the future
held for them. What saps they were, looking for anyone who might have
a foot in the door of the spiritual world to guide them. It was like
taking candy from a baby.
I spent so much time performing my art for those who commissioned me
that I must've gained quite the local reputation; it was only a year
or so after moving to the city that I was summoned by the governor!
"What an honor!" I said; "What an opportunity!" I thought. The
governor wanted me to tell him of his future. Most would think that it
would sound rather strange for a man of such political power to look
to a sorcerer for advice, especially a man who was as intelligent and
known for his skepticism as this one. Keep in mind that people were
really starting to open up to the spiritual world during this time. It
seemed like almost everyone had their own diviner they'd call upon
when unsure about finances, employment, their love life or any other
thing that might worry them. To think that the governor would choose
me as the one he turned to! I was positive that he'd pay good money
for my services. Of course, I wanted to look my best, so I went out
and bought myself a brand new outfit to impress my new client. Even if
it was a bit pricey, I knew that I'd be able to make up for it after
my first payment from my new boss.
The governor was indeed impressed with me. So much, in fact, that he
gave me a position in his office. I was officially part of his adviser
staff, and thus I was set. What else did I need? I had the most
powerful local politician under my thumb and he was paying me to keep
him there! I quickly became known as a powerful magician who could
summon forth spirits to bring me word of the future or command them to
haunt those who opposed the governor. He didn't mind in the slightest
that it was publicly known that he called upon the advice of an
occultist; it seemed like more and more politicians were on the look
out for such advisors, and I was certainly fortunate to get picked up
so quickly­—or so I thought.
A little under a year went by and I continued to keep the governor in
place using my false predictions. That is, until the day I heard word
of a traveling pair of preachers of some crazy new religion that had
come to our city. Knowing that my boss wasn't the type to be easily
swayed by such rookie con artists, I didn't worry over the matter
much, but kept an eye on them anyway­—we wouldn't want anyone usurping
the position I've worked so hard to attain, now would we? Of course
It was only a day or two later that I was on my way to the governor's
office when I heard him through his door, and he was speaking to
someone. He was telling one of his men to fetch these new acolytes who
were supposedly very powerful and knowledgeable about the spiritual. I
couldn't believe it! These neophytes were moving in on my territory,
and I couldn't take that. Of course I wouldn't simply burst through
the door, outraged, and tell my boss how he was making a mistake­—this
called for cunning!
Later that day when the governor was just about ready to head
homeward, I entered his office with a look of panic on my face. I told
him of a dreadful vision I experienced; in it were two priests of some
new order who had come to deceive him, to make a fool of him with
their wily ways. I described the two men and what they were about in
great detail, making sure to point out time and time again how
treacherous and cunning they were. It was really quite convincing. I
had practiced my performance for hours in the mirror before coming to
my boss with it, yet he wasn't convinced. The man I had so faithfully
guided through the past few months was unsure of my predictions
(alright, faithfully isn't really the correct word for my loyalty)!
How did this happen? What could I do? I pleaded with him to reconsider
the meeting he scheduled with them, but he wouldn't listen. Unsure of
what my next move would be and simply astounded at the fact that my
boss was so unwilling to listen, I went home to plot what I would do
The day of the meeting with the supposed "prophets" came upon us and
I had used my time before then wisely in researching what they were
about and what they might say to the governor to convince him of their
ways. I had a comeback for every line they might say; for every
argument they might make I would have a way to counter it. I was ready
for them­—there was no way I was getting pushed out of my spot by a
couple of amateurs.
When the time came for the two men to enter the governor's office, I
was there with my boss. I had convinced him to let me stay for the
sake of protecting him should they try to use some sort of evil charm
on him (I spent quite a lot of time describing to him the various
types of curses they could use on him and how powerful they were, but
their simple hexes were no match for my mighty magic, of course.) In
the two preachers came, and though I knew before that I didn't like
them, I knew for sure now that I simply hated them. Them with their
calm demeanor and their friendly greetings of peace­—I knew what they
were up to, and they weren't going to get away with it.
They were more cunning than I had foreseen. For every comeback I
made, they had a way to explain it all. For every method I possessed
of ruining them and making them flee from the office in shame, they
had means of defusing the situation. No matter what I did, I couldn't
stop them from speaking! The governor started to seem genuinely
interested in what they were about, so I knew I had to act fast: I
moved up to my boss and started whispering in his ear. To no avail I
pulled out every card I had, trying to persuade him that this pair of
liars could not be trusted. Finally I shouted, "Sir, it's clear
they've put an enchantment on you! Look at the way you defend their
crazy talk! They must leave at once while there's still time to
reverse the hex!"
Immediately I felt a pair of eyes upon me, like a couple of burning
coals searing through my facade. The shorter of the two men was
staring intently upon me, and when he spoke to me, his voice sounded
like thunder. He rebuked me, called me the spawn of hell and announced
that I was nothing more than a fraud, a sham­—the very same things I
had been calling him and his companion­—yet when he spoke these
accusations, he did so with authority and power, like none I had ever
seen. He asked me how long I would continue to pervert and twist the
ways of his good and righteous god. When I could not answer, he
pointed at me and spoke again, telling me to watch now as his god
would teach me a lesson for being so vile and corrupt; he said I would
be blind for quite a while. I scoffed at him! How dare he try to beat
me at my own game, but the jig was up! I knew there was no way he
could miraculously cause me to lose my sight.
Now pay close attention here, for it was at this point­—when I felt
so high and mighty, that I had finally won­­­—that I was humbled and
truly defeated. It was at that moment that my whole life turned upside
down. Before I could say anything in reply to his insane proclamation,
my eyes started to grow misty; the world around me started to become
unclear and dark. I cried out for help, but no one would come to my
aid, not even the governor whom I had helped for so long. As the black
haze enveloped my vision, the last thing I saw was the face of the man
who brought this upon me­—the man who was known as the Apostle Paul.
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